While turning 18 is considered a milestone (at least, to girls), nobody ever told me that getting past your second decade in life was an even bigger deal, though in less epic proportions than the said overrated debut year.
It’s a bigger deal, because it is at this point in your young adult life that you realize that it’s not easy finding your place in society. It’s not easy, finding yourself in the middle of the road, with no way to go back and with no way to go forward. See, nobody left behind a map.
It is at this point that you realize that the people who told you said that you will be a successful somebody in the future played a cruel joke on you. When I was young, my mom told me that I would become a Ms. Universe one day, and that I would win all those great stuff and get to travel with my crown, sash and scepter. And with each passing Ms. Universe year, I waited for the time when I would turn into this tall, leggy and flawless blond with the bouncy walk and great smile. Adolescence came and I remained short, ordinary and as un-glamorous as I could possibly be. I got my pearly whites in college, when I got my braces, and I’ve been told that I walk like a dinosaur.
In my elementary school yearbook, I wrote that I was going to be a neurosurgeon when I grew up. If truth be told, I just wanted to impress everyone with my vocabulary. And as it is, I am not a neurosurgeon. I am not even in med school.
Instead, I am 3 and twenty years, single, a disappointment to some, gainfully employed and getting wider rather than taller. I have ceased to dream dreams because I realized that it hurts when they won’t come true.
But, it’s my birthday, and in my country, it’s a default reason for me to be happy. (Crosses out an entire paragraph of negative stuff).
Revised realizations:
So, I also realize that I am blessed to have a job that pays reasonably well. I am blessed because I have my weekends unlike my friends who are nurses and call center agents. I am happy because I get to work with a person who once taught me how to write.
I am happy because I finally got the Watchmen comic that I have been wanting for years. I am happy because despite my insecurities and failings as a person, I still have my family, my friends and my dog, and I am learning new maths.
I am happy because college taught me that I could pass my exams without cheating. I am happy because I am learning that it is not too late to do what I want to do in life (though at this time, I am not entirely sure what it is I want to do in life).
I am being too melodramatic. I just wanted to greet myself a happy birthday.
It tends to happen a lot when you grow older.
